Tuesday, March 06, 2007

Letting Go

Alec is teaching me about letting go.

I have always thought of letting go as a kind of surrender. Giving up. Losing. Even when the things I am holding on to aren't things I want. Prejudices, grudges, sentimental shahsh. Anger. Guilt. Self-righteousness.

There is stability and comfort into holding on to these things. I know them. They keep me on my current course. Safety in stubbornness.

I saw another image of letting go when watching Alec, who is learning how to walk. Most of the time he creeps from one piece of furniture to another, unwilling to fall. Every now and again he screws up the courage to let go. Joy. Amazement. Such an expression of overwhelming happiness. From letting go.

It helps me think of things differently. There is no element of surrender in what he is doing-- at least not in a negative sense. He is surrendering the stability of the table for the mobility-- for access to the wide world.

Where am I anchored by the things I believe give me stability? What joy will I feel when I can find the courage to let go?